Stuck on a Cruise Missile Bound for the American Dream

CONNECTICUT

My name is Richard Rowlands, and I'm a 20 year old English and American Studies student at the University of Nottingham, currently on a year abroad at the University of Connecticut (UCONN).

Originally from a small, Welsh speaking town in North Wales, I am still regularly baffled as to how a long series of events and decisions has successfully resulted in me leaving the comfortingly banal embrace of the Clwydian Mountain Range and has instead placed me amidst the vast and varied expanse of the North American continent. I know that it has something to do with the following:

1) A desire to experience and to immerse myself in the hyper-real world that is the United States.
2) An intuitive need to live life in another country in order to learn more about myself as well as the rest of the world.
3) A vague notion of being in pursuit of the American Dream, both spiritually and physically.
4) Having girls obsess over me because of my British accent.

At an American Football game with some Australian exchange students

Originally, my intention was to live in somewhere that would be considered 'real America': my conception of 'real America' at this time was somewhere where there would be a lot of hillbillies driving around in trucks with a shotgun over one shoulder and a dead alligator over the other, shouting "'Murica!" at every possible opportunity and where most of the people wouldn't be sure whether or not Britain was in Europe, let alone whether or not Wales was in Britain. In other words, I wanted to go to Louisiana. The decision to come to UCONN was more my dad's than it was my own. When I told him the options I had of which American universities to go to, he began to research them all obsessively, mostly in terms of safety and academic reputation. As he was doing so, I started to think a bit more soberly about whether or not I really wanted to go to somewhere where I might still be mistaken for a spy working for the Red Coats, and I simultaneously realised that I wanted to stay as far away from lenient gun laws as possible. It was around this time that my dad suggested UCONN: located in a small New England state rich with American history; in close proximity to both New York City and Boston; also close to the Canadian border, should I wish to travel there; and a place of high academic repute, whilst still boasting a reputation of being something of a partying college. I realised then that this was the place that I wanted to go to.

We visited Yale university on our travels. Elihu Yale- the benefactor- was actually from North Wales, and there's a Yale college in Wrexham. It isn't quite as famous as its North American equivalent though

I arrived approximately four weeks ago with my dad and brother, seven days before college began: we spent that week driving around some of New England. My first impression was as follows: After getting briefly detained at the airport for not having a DS-2019 form, dad rented a car and his atrocious driving on the interstate led to a woman leaning out of her SUV and screaming/ flipping the bird at us as she drove past. We finally arrived at the hotel and while dad and I were checking in, we noticed that a dubious looking woman was talking to my hilariously naive brother on a sofa whilst being watched by a guy making tense hand signals to her, and when we approached they both ran off to a lift and the woman's tracksuit trousers fell down, revealing a sight that will forever be tattooed into my irises. That night, I asked myself: what on earth have I gotten myself into by coming here for a year?

The rest of the week was, in stark contrast, a wonderful experience. What struck us was just how friendly everyone was: every person whom we asked for directions would stop what they were doing and go out of their way to make sure that we'd find our desired destination. Everyone was fascinated by our accents and wanted to know where we were from, and seemed overjoyed to have us in their country. Then we discovered Dunkin' Donuts. It is huge here- Boston alone has 131 of them (apparently). It is the quintessential American experience: within any of its outlets' four hallowed walls, you will find a huge range of diversity (in terms of doughnuts); the freedom to do and have whatever you can think of, providing you can afford it (you must have a large strawberry frozen coffee with extra cream at some point before you die); gluttony and excess; consumerism (I bought a Dunkin' Doughnuts t-shirt); and finally, friendly customer service.

What the American Dream actually looks like

The college experience here is vastly different to our own in Nottingham. Firstly, I share a room with three other people: which, so far, has only been great fun. Sports here are so much bigger: the people from all over the State come to watch the different teams play in huge stadiums. The men's soccer team (I am already calling it soccer- I'll probably be crucified when I get home) are currently the best team in the nation- and a season ticket is only $20. Just going to see one Wrexham game costs more than that, and they're absolutely hopeless at the moment. The people are different too: everyone is a lot louder and more extroverted, which at times is irritating, but on the whole I think it will be a good way of improving one's confidence by simply being around them. Also, you will perhaps be surprised as to how un-stylish the Americans are: in Nottingham, not wearing something from Jack Wills is an admission of irreversible poverty and self-loathing, whereas here, everyone wears horrendously garish running shoes, shapeless beige shorts and ketchup stained sleeveless vests. No one cares, and I like it.

Finally (and let's be honest, most importantly) what they say about the British accent in America is true: I feel like a celebrity every time a word comes out of my mouth. It truly is amazing. The other night, I managed to convince a busload of students to sing the American national anthem for me: it was one of the most bizarre- but amazing- experiences of my life. I've only been here for a month but time is already going by too quickly. Hopefully in nine months time I will have achieved my dream of waking up in a prison cell in Las Vegas, with a dead alligator draped over one shoulder and Donald Trump's daughter over the other, and with a Dunkin' Doughnuts iced coffee spilled over my horrendously garish running shoes. In the time in between however, UCONN has already proven that it has the ability to cater for my every narcissistic need and I'm savouring every moment.